I had many conversations with a guy I fancied.He flirted with me, accidentally touched my leg and apologised, and replied to all my texts. He never sent me one text though which was odd. He invited me out with his mates once and I went but think I came on too strong (i texted him and asked him out again as soon as I got home) The following week i asked him out again and he said he would let me know but never got back to me. i decided to leave it and play it cool. Then 5 days later I had a car crash and texted him to tell him, I also added that I wouldnt bother him anymore with my texts. he replied immediately saying I wasnt bothering him and asking if I was alright. he also added lots of humourous comments. This is mixed messages. Does it sound like he does like me? Maybe I should try the direct face to face invite out instead of text?

Sam's Response

Very difficult questions you asked there. I am not sure whether I can answer them accurately. I will break down each of your questions and answer them individually.

Men don't accidentally touch a woman's leg. This was done on purpose especially seem as though he was flirting with you at the time. What was your reactions when he touched your leg? Did you react negatively in any way? If you did, he may have drawn the conclusion that you didn't fancy him.

What type of bloke is he? Is he a verbally confident type of guy or is he a bit shy? If he is the confident type guy: he is probably trying to make you do all work. In other words you text him and show him how much you want him. If he is the shy kind of guy, he will probably hold back from texting you because he does not want to seem like a stalker. Moreover I always find that women give overkeen men the flick, so he may have learnt from past experiences not to contact women too much too soon.

It is true that coming on too strong can scare many men off. Well it depends what you mean by coming on too strong. Most men don't want to see any signs of commitment to a relationship for the first few dates. And commitment includes overly possessive body language such as snuggling up to him when he is with his friends or using possessive language.

But if you meant you came on too strong by offering him sex, then maybe he is the very rare shy type of guy that doesn't like jumping at a sexual opportunity. To most men, sex is not classed as commitment and therefore that is not classed as coming on too strong. Sounds odd but that's the way men think!

However in your case it does not look good. You have asked him out twice and asking him out once should have been enough. I advise you to forget about him and move onto someone else.

Unfortunately, no I would say he probably does not fancy you. Sorry to give you such bad news! If he really did fancy you, he would have jumped at your first attempt to ask him out, or at least the second.

My best friend often texts women back when he is drunk, looking for sex or lonely. He does not want a long term relationship with any of them, he just does it on the spur of the moment. He then asks the women to come out with some of his friends on the spur of the moment. Then when it gets to the date, his mood is totally different because he is not drunk, not lonely and not gagging for sex.

In your case you have made it clear that you fancy him, if he wants to take it further, he should be the one taking it further not you.

I would say your chances of being with him were blown on the first night when he touched your leg and then said sorry about it. It did not necessarily go wrong because of your fault but was maybe that first night when you were not in sync with each other. It was not meant to be, so move on.