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Ali-England on 09/04/2006
Iv been having casual sex with this bloke
for 2months now, and recently iv noticed im starting to get emotionally
attached. We have been on several dates and normally after these dates, end up back at his house having sex.
You are bound to get emotionally attached
to someone you are having sex with and meeting up with regularly, it's
almost natural.
This bloke is very attractive, but im
starting to get concerned about his needs in bed. Im a very confident
lady in the bedroom, but this man knows no limits! He enjoys anal sex, he
enjoys using numerous toys on me and recently he asked me to pee on him!
If you don't enjoy that sort of thing you
should tell him, them is no point in doing
things you don't want to do. True, it's possible that if you don't
try something you won't whether you'll like it, but really you shouldn't
be doing things you are uncomfortable doing, particularly sex wise.
Quite a few men will want to do more than a woman would be willing to do,
it's just most men wouldn't dare ask for fear of losing their
woman. I certainly wouldn't try anal sex on a woman,
unless she made it clear she wanted to try it. You have got to
wonder what you are going to be doing next, because once you've gone so
far he will continue to keep pushing the barriers.
I was with my previous partner for 3
years and enjoyed our sex life, but my new man is completely filthy! I do
enjoy having sex with my new bloke, but its starting to make me feel
slight degraded and a little bit used. (I cant
seem to say no! – when I say no, he usually gets his own way).
You have got attached to him, so one part
of your brain will be telling you, you don't want to do these degrading
things and the other part will be saying, if I don't I will lose
him. He has you hooked and probably thinks he can get away with
doing anything. If you find them degrading then you shouldn't be
doing them and you need to tell him that. If he suddenly dumps you
for it, the you know he wasn't worth being with
anyway. You have a right to be happy and you can't be happy doing
things you find degrading.
What you should say to him, is that you
don't mind being experimental sex wise, but you would prefer to stop
doing the things you find degrading. If he doesn't like it, he
knows the way to the door, and if he doesn't like it, then it's best for
you if he finds his way to the door. Because you can't spend the
rest of your life doing degrading things for him, he has to respect your
needs.
My bloke has asked me what I expect from
him, in the future. I have always made it clear It was always just a
little fun, but the more time Im spending with him the more I want.
The more time, you spend with the more you
will fall in love with him. It is up to you to make a decision, do
you want him for the rest of your life or not. The fact that he is
asking about your future, makes me suspect he might want a bit more than
fun, to actually bring that up in conversation. Or maybe he just
doesn't want to hurt you and wants to make sure you are not getting too
attached to him. I can't really tell you that, it is up to you to
extract that information from him, in whatever way you can.
After sex, we enjoy the cuddles and
pillow talk, but im still confused!
That's good, he doesn't just shoot off
after sex, he gives you some TLC. But you
have got to start to make a decision, do you see yourself spending the
rest of your life with this guy, or is it just a bit of fun/a fling?
I want to no, how long can two single
people have casual sex for?
Judging by some of my friends, it can continue
for years. But it is not really healthy for your long term future,
if you are just having casual sex with someone. Eventually you are
going to be getting old, and want to settle down with someone, if you are
having casual sex with someone, that is going to get in the way or you
finding someone who is more long term.
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