I need help, why is it that me and my ex partner of 5 years have been
finished 10 months, and I just cant get him out of my head.
You have spent a large chunk of your life with him,
and he is probably almost like family. The only people you have probably
seen more of in your life, is your close family. If you stopped seeing
them, the chances are you would seriously miss them, the same is true of this
boyfriend. Except it is different circumstances with your boyfriend.
You have split up on bad terms and really need to get each other out of your
minds. It's time to move on, like you would leave a job and leave all the
friends from that job behind.
I wake up every morning still wondering what he will be doing, I think
about him throughout the day a lot, and still find myself wanting to go to the
places that I know he is going to be even though i don't. He has a new
girlfriend now and I cant help but feel so jealous, not because I think she's
pretty but because i feel that she has got my man.
This is probably part of the healing process for
him, having a new girlfriend and getting you out of his mind, and finding out
that it is actually good to have someone else. Though he is probably still
thinking of you from time to time and wondering what it would have been like if
he was still with you.
You also need to move on and find a new man, begin
to realise that there are men out there who you can have a better time with.
There are men out there who you could settle down with and spend the rest of
your life with. Another man could easily last longer than the 5 year
relationship you have had with this other man. You may not find your ideal
man immediately but he is out there somewhere.
I think I should be over him by now but I just cannot stop thinking about
him and all the good things we used to get up to together. I must say that the
reason why we finished is because I cheated, but I regret that so much that when
people ask me about it I get upset and start crying because I feel that it was
the biggest mistake I have ever made and also extremely guilty because that is
not in my nature to do something like that.
Again, you have got to get over that, you made a
mistake, everybody makes mistakes. The important thing is you learn from
that mistake and never do it again. When you find the man of your dreams
you have to make sure you don't fall into the trap of cheating on him.
What happened in the past, you should learn from, but never get stuck in the
past because the future always hold something better.
Reply by Puzzled (a regular visitor to my site) on
28.02.06
This man and I fell in love head over heels for 2.5 years. He was and
still is married. I know what you all think, but it was true love: we were good
friends, compatible, we had good sex, we cared about each other's feelings so
whenever there was a problem, we'd bring it up and discuss it instead of burying
it, we were happy. Two of his friends knew about us and were absolutely sure
that he did love me. He worked from home and I wasn't working at the time, so
we'd spend daytime together at his place. To cut a long story short, too much
for him to give up (he was 59, when we split up). No regrets at all: I now know
what love feels like. What it is I should look for in a relationship. Anyway,
"delicious", just wanted to say the relationship lasted 2.5 years and it took me
2.5 years to get over him. So there. Good luck. You'll be ok.
