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futileefforts on 29/06/2005
if a guy used to talk to
you a lot and now no longer talks to you anymore at all after
conversation got a bit weird after he realised that you liked him, what
does that mean?
Sam's response
A similar thing happened
to me, except in my case it was a woman who no longer talked to me.
Eventually after giving her some time, I got my head around the fact she
was only a friend. From that point onwards I have talked to her as a
friend only. Actually I think it has added something else to the
relationship in that she seems to be thinking, does he fancy me after
all? (because I never actually told her I fancied her, I think she just
worked out from what I said).
In your case my interpretation is that it could mean one of two things:
1) He saw you as a friend or a sister figure and enjoyed talking to you
on a friendly/sisterly basis. He then found out you fancy him and because
he does not fancy you, it has made him very uncomfortable around you. He
probably can't get his head around the idea (Can I talk to her as a friend,
even though I know she fancies me?). Men often find it very difficult to
communicate and avoidance is usually what they opt for.
My recommendation is to either forget about him or to try and engage him
again as a friend, anything else it not going to work.
2) He did fancy you but the conversation that you had creeped him out.
Men very rarely tell a woman if they are creeped out by something.
Just as women find some things that men say a little creepy, men find
some things that women say creepy. With men it is usually something
emotional that he finds creepy or coming on too strong, too quickly.
It may seem something minor or petty to a woman, but believe me a mans
mind works differently to a womans. For example asking Do you love me? or
working out how many children you want and where you want to live on the
first date or aggressive talk like I punched my last boyfriend because I
think he was cheating on me or my last boyfriend treated me really badly.
My recommendation in this case is again to engage him as friend (don't be
too pushy or try to spend too much time with him). Try and avoid any
conversation that makes him feel uncomfortable. If you are lucky he will
forget about the conversation eventually and work you back into his life
as a friend. Then if you are very lucky he might fancy you again.
It could be that you are putting a barrier in the way without even
noticing. I think this was probably the case with the woman I had a
problem with. Without knowing it, I was avoiding her and my body language
looked uncomfortable when she was around. As soon as I got my head round
the fact she was just a friend and I valued her as a friend, everything
was good again.
In conclusion: the safest option would be to presume that he does not
fancy you. Either forget about him or work him back into your life as a
friend.
Click
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