Reply by Sam

He obviously fancies you in some way, to actually go out of his way to say "you were a very nice girl and he felt he could trust you".  This guy knows how to win a woman's heart and get her hooked by making warm statements like this.

But the truth comes out when people are drunk.  They lose the ability to control what they say and often say what they are thinking as well as talk complete rubbish in between.  This guy has given you a warning that he is still in love with his ex.  And to me that warning should result in you staying well away from this one.  Why he decided to say this I don't know.  Because he thought he might make you jealous and want him more, knowing there was another woman in the picture.  Because he was drunk and the truth came out.  Because he knows that honesty is the best policy with women and that you would have found out anyway, and that if he is honest with you now, you will almost expect him to go back to his ex after a bit of a fling with you and he won't feel as guilty because he warned you.

He is obviously a player based on the statement he made earlier that he liked you and could trust you.  That statement in isolation would demonstrate a warm, caring man, but what makes me think he is a player is by later saying he is still in love with his ex.  So he was almost trying to deceive you earlier, get you hooked, by making a nice statement. Once hooked he demonstrates the reality of the situation.

That reality is .... He fancies you or fancies a shag from you but he might end up going back to his ex.  This is the type of guy you want to avoid, he is the type who will always be sucking women in and being unfaithful to whoever he is going out with.  He wants to have several pieces of cake at a time and be eating all of them.  He wants women in reserve, so that when one goes he can move onto the next and then later move back to his ex, convincing her that he has changed.

Of course it is also possible that he has changed his mind about fancying you,  and decided to throw in something bad to dissuade you from pursuing him further.  But I don't see the point in doing this, it is more likely he was drunk and the truth came out about his player attitude to women.  And that is emphasized by the fact he no longer gives you eye contact or speaks to you.

It may also be that he fancied you, but later decided he is not over his ex yet and therefore did not want to get involved with you.  So it may not be a sinister plot on his part, that is a possibility also.

It maybe that when he is desperate for a shag, he will come out of the cold and start pursuing you again.  It may be that he is just going through a cold period to get you hooked and intrigued why he is not paying you any attention.  It maybe that he has worked out that he is not going to get anything out of you, so given you up as a lost cause.  It maybe that he thinks you don't fancy him anymore.  It maybe that there was nothing sinsister about this situation and he was just saying I'm not ready for a relationship yet, but will get back to you when I am.  That's a lot of maybe's but I don't know a definite answer.

Conclusion: Player, stay well away from him.  Because he will try to suck you into his lair and then spit you out when the next woman comes along.  Only to try his luck with you again when he is has no women on the go.

There is a chance that he may not be player and he was just trying to warn you off because he is not ready for relationship with anyone else, but in general most men tend to move onto their next relationship, even before they are over their ex.  Because why turn down someone you fancy?

Click here to Ask Sam some questions