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A Long distance relationship, he showed interest in me first PDF Print
Written by longdistancelove   

OK So I'm friends with someone who lives in another country, and we have worked together as well. He's a really great guy .. maybe not "GQ" but has a huge heart, really sweet, good man, works hard, and is talented. He's very attentive and is always writing me by email or text. Recently he arrived in the USA and so I have seen him a couple of times, and will again one more time. He is truly wonderful but unsure of my feelings, especially since he lives soooooo far away. I don't want to "put my heart on hold" when I just got out of a long marriage that ended up as a nightmare. Maybe I'm just in a bad place, bad time. He seems to be in love with me (but that's just my guess).  Or at least, his feelings are ahead of mine; as he started to like me far before I "noticed" him that way.  I also thought this based on what he says and does. He said he "doesn't want to lose me" and "he knows everything about me".... and "I'm number one" to him.

It sounds as though you have a clear indication that he likes you.  I say that because you said he showed interest in you first, this is a very good sign for women.  Then just to confirm that, he is brave enough to emphasize how special you are to him by coming up with a few very unique and positive phrases for you.  All of this indicating he adores you.

It's great to hear such wonderful things, but what can I do? We are so far apart, can anything really develop from this?

If a guy is so in love with a woman, then he will give up everything and make sure he is not so far apart from you.  But wait a moment, I've just read backwards again, you said he is from another country, he's not somebody seeking american citizenship is he? If he is then that would put a different perspective on things.

He'll be going home soon.. and I don't know where in his mind this will be for him. It would be "too heavy" to ask, and also suggestive. So I like to keep it light.  I don't want to add pressure on either one of us, especially since I'm not really sure it's what I want.  Maybe I'm just afraid. 

Also, since the internet keeps us visually together, and I mean visually, not just emails, he can actively see my participation online so we are still "around" each other. And me him.  I don't want our "work" environment to be affected, and I am afraid to hurt his feelings too, because he seems to be concerned always who I speak to. I know this is difficult for him so what is the best way to deal with this?

I should have also mentioned that we did kiss... briefly...but nothing else. So yes, we did "cross the line" a bit of friendship.  I will see him once more as I said, before he crosses the seas to return home; I don't know what will incur in this last visit (I don't plan on being intimate, for me it's too soon anyway); I think however, I should go so I can be clearer on how I feel about this:  Should I let it go or should I consider this could be a good guy for me (of course, not by time zone.)

It sounds to me like he is trying to push things more quickly than you are comfortable with, as if he is for some reason desperate to get with you, because he either fancies you so much, or because he wants to settle down where you live.  The key question I ask in all this.  Is whether this guy is a foreign guy and looking for american citizenship, you don't give me any indication of that but I'm suspicious by what you have said that he maybe?  Though saying that when people do travel a lot, the limited time they spend with each person, I can imagine they want to rush into things. Because before long they will be off travelling again and won't have had chance to tie things up.  There is some reason somewhere why he seems to be rushing his interest in you, what reason I can't figure out from what you have said.

Sigh.

Want to get the opinion of other ladies who visit this web site?  Try my new forum .

 

 
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